Limbaugh Explains "The Real Story Of Thanksgiving"
On the Nov. 21 edition of his nationally syndicated radio show, Rush Limbaugh presented "The Real Story Of Thanksgiving," which somehow had little to do with giving thanks, and more to do with praising the merits of capitalism.
LIMBAUGH: "Long before Karl Marx was even born, the Pilgrims had discovered and experimented with what could only be described as socialism. And what happened? It didn't work! Surprise, surprise, huh? ... (W)hile most of the rest of the world has been experimenting with socialism for well over a hundred years – trying to refine it, perfect it, and re-invent it – the Pilgrims decided early on to scrap it permanently. What Bradford wrote about this social experiment should be in every schoolchild's history lesson."
For conservatives, perhaps Limbaugh tells a heartwarming story.
Keeping in the spirit of his re-interpretaton of Thanksgiving, listeners may want to mark their calendars now, in case Limbaugh spews these other re-interpretations of upcoming holidays:
-- "The Real Story Of Hanukkah" (Dec. 16). "What the left won't tell you is that Hanukkah shows how desperate people can become if they don't have a sensible, pro-growth energy policy. Had these Jews committed to exploratory drilling, they may have had oil not just for eight days, but hundreds."
-- "The Real Story Of Christmas" (Dec. 25). "Santa Claus is representative of the success of American capitalism. Here we have a sole proprietor who succeeds because he doesn't have to worry about elfen labor laws. If the liberals had their way, Santa's workshop would have been closed years ago."
-- "The Real Story Of Martin Luther King Day" (Jan. 15). "The liberals don't want you to know that King was a Republican, and would not have supported the creation of this holiday. I believe there are quotes from King saying other Americans are more deserving. The fact that those Americans are white males is irrelevant."
Check your local listings ...